First, from alert reader [profile] gargoylerose we see that the squirrels are, gasp, ARMORING UP. People! Do not increase their access to weapons technology!

Second, from alert reader [personal profile] wyldemusick, this explains the superiority of cats:

From several alert readers, more dispatches from the ongoing squirrel-human war:

1) Now, they are disguising themselves as helpful superheroes. Do not be deceived! Just look at those stances!

2) And, they are biting our Olympic athletes. In a decidedly alarming foreshadowing of the abysmal reporting we can expect from NBC on the Olympics, this is how they chose to portray the event; this is an alleged picture of the miscreant.

3) But finally, a bit of a counterweapon.
Video of squirrel versus Disney monorail. No, really.

Sure, Disney claims no one was hurt, but for all we know, squirrels, not mice, are writing their press releases.
Vicious squirrels set fires in their ongoing war against humans. (I may possibly be editing the considerably calmer headline written by NBC, but mine's more accurate.)

In related news, we had a slight tinge of wildfire smoke in the air last night, which seems fortunately gone now. Hoping -- really hoping -- for rain tonight and then this weekend when a frontal boundary comes through. Not just to bring my roses back into shambling zombie life.
It's been awhile since I've updated you on the status of the squirrel human war, but several alert readers passed along this warning: now, they are turning PURPLE (also from io9.com here. I leave you to imagine WHAT THIS MEANS.

And from the front lines, an assurance that, and I quote, squirrels must be going to some kind of Rambo class. And some of you were suggesting it's just me, although it is only fair, I suppose, to note that alert reader [personal profile] stevenglassman sent along this countersuggestion.

Meanwhile, I must tell you that, even as I type, two squirrels are doing something they would doubtless call "playing" and I am calling "scouting" on the maple tree just outside my window. I did warn you all.
Our internet cable, twitchy for the past few days, decided to die entirely late this morning. As it turns out, this is less the fault of Brighthouse and more the fault of a "compromised" cable line. No, the cable has not been selling secrets to spies. However, at some point in the past, someone decided to do something interesting with the cable line, which in turn exposed it to the vicious attacks of squirrels and the rain.

And some of you are still trying to claim that squirrels are just playful, innocent little consumers of nuts. Ha.

Anyway, while the cable was out, the latest Tor.com post went up, this one about Edith Nesbit's first book for children, The Story of the Treasure Seekers.

I had hoped I'd be able to write about Nesbit's early adult novels, but they seem to be incredibly unavailable, in ebook or used book or library format, so the next few posts will be focused on her children's literature. Which isn't a bad thing, only that the adult novels are more obscure (which happens if you can't get to them) and part of the fun of this series has been the at least occasional look at more obscure books.
Erk! I thought I had posted this a couple weeks back, but in the confusion of doing various March things, apparently not. From alert readers [personal profile] stevenglassman and [personal profile] zoethe comes the alarming news that a squirrel is attacking innocent residents of Vermont and might go ballistic AT ANY TIME.

In related news, two squirrels are outside on the maple tree right now, twitching their tails, and pretending that they are just playing. Hmm. More practicing acrobatic attacks, I'd say.
A number of you have taken the time to alert me that today is Squirrel Appreciation Day.

I am just going to remind you all that we are talking about the same creatures who can survive a tiger attack.

(For the record, this blog does not endorse the language contained in the above article. Far from "finding itself," this blog is certain that the squirrel deliberately headed to the tiger enclosure for some military training.)

Also, this.

Meanwhile, the Humane Society promises to help us all with our squirrel issues, but I think we all know which side THEY'RE on.
Fear not, my readers. Even with moving, renovations, various projects, ranting about medieval politics, taking care of the needs of cats who have so not been going in and out of contraband tunnels under the bathtub no matter what dusty little pawprints leading from said contraband tunnels might imply (you aren't saying their innocent looks can't be trusted, are you?) I have not lost sight of the squirrel war.

First up comes from alert reader [profile] fizzgig_bites, who notes that that the evil minds behind squirrel underwear have now turned to something even more evil: Girl Squirrel Underpants. Let us for a moment attempt to ignore the disturbing gender issues surrounding this, and instead focus on the main point: HUMANS! We are at WAR with squirrels! Not clothing them!

On a considerably more hopeful note, [personal profile] stevenglassman sends along this, which suggests that they may just need a touch more training.

And from the New York Daily News, it seems that former subway vigilante Bernard Goetz has turned to, and none of us should find this, given his history, even slightly surprising, actually HELPING squirrels.
It should go without saying that I disapprove entirely of this sort of thing.

Meanwhile, I am just going to post this without comment. (Scientifically safe for work despite the title.)
I have always wondered about the ultimate loyalty of cats:

Cat adopts baby squirrel.

Those of you concerned about the many failures of the U.S. media - a concern I share - might also notice that, far from raising the alert here, the reporter in question actually seems to approve of this entire act of treason. Sigh.

In related news, now, they are attempting to take over cruise ships. And I think we can now see that the media will be of no assistance in stopping them.

Thanks to [profile] jeremytblack for the first link.
1. From multiple sources on the net, this, from the good folks at the Christian Science Monitor, may just be the headline of the year: "Monkeys hate flying squirrels, report monkey-annoyance experts....The research could pave the way for advanced methods of enraging monkeys." (I am quoting. Directly.)

Had I but known, before now, that people could actually have careers in enraging monkeys and developing advanced methods to do so, my life would be very, very different. And undoubtedly haunted by raging packs of infuriated monkeys wielding Stitch toys and wearing hulu skirts shrieking that I have halted their can-can lessons. Or something.

Anyway, good to know that in this, the monkeys are On Our Side.

2. Tropical Storm Colin forms in the Atlantic.

2. You know, back in the day, preparing for travel sort of went like this;

Put things in bag.
Put books in bag.
Go.

These days, preparing for travel involves charging the scooter, the phone, the netbook, the Sony reader, the iPod - I could probably add more if needed. Charge then travel. In contrast to the medieval method of travel, then horse charge!

3. Speaking of which, a general reminder that my internet access from tonight until at least Sunday will probably be spotty/limited/not a major priority, although I'll still be trying to check email and Twitter on occasion, and may try to sneak in a blog post now and again.
...I don't even have the words for this.

Thanks to [personal profile] stevenglassman for the link.
The New York Times kindly alerts readers to the tactical deceptions employed by grey squirrels. WARNING: contains distressing admission from a human who states that he is "flattered" by the term "squirrelly." We need to keep an eye on this one. PhD or not, I think he may be a traitor to the cause.

Lest some of you continue to think that I am overstating the threat, let me just note that over in California, the squirrels are viciously SPREADING bubonic plague (the Los Angeles Times has a considerably less interesting take on this here, proving that the Los Angeles Times really needs to do a bit of work on their sensationalist techniques if they want to remain proud members of the American media). And if that weren't enough, black SUPER SQUIRRELS (their term, not mine!) are appearing all over England, spreading their war.
Been a bit silent over here thanks to the need to focus on one of those irritating to frustrating to auugh I don't want to do this anymore I FEEL SICK Real Life Things, a project that has left me in the sort of mood where I could start a flame war about pretty much anything anywhere, which might be fun, but, probably unhelpful. (I sense that this will be a cue to many of you to start defending the squirrels or Milli Vanilli.)

To keep myself sane through this, I've finally gotten around to reading through all of the archives for Questionable Content. Long term readers will not be at all surprised to learn that this was the strip that won my hardened little cynical heart, but apart from the display of an Appropriate Squirrel Attitude, I have to say that Questionable Content reads much better when you do read it like this – through the entire archive, rather than in daily snippets; it's not just addictive, but surprisingly absorbing. (I found that when I was just catching strips here and there, it was amusing, but I had problems following what was going on, especially since some of the characters, especially in early strips, are easy to confuse visually if you aren't paying regular attention.)

(Plus, I kinda like to think I'm a bit like Dora. Admittedly I'm probably more like Faye, only less focused and with less interesting musical tastes, but, let's all spare me my illusions, shall we?)

In other bits, I note with amusement that BP is upset about a parody Twitter feed. Dudes, far be it for me to, you know, give you public relations advice, but I have to say that someone making fun of you on Twitter is probably the least of your problems right now.

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