Oh, NBC

Feb. 7th, 2014 10:51 pm
Every single Olympics I optimistically assume that, bad though NBC's commentary will be, it cannot possibly be as bad as the commentary at the previous Olympics.

And then, we have tonight's NBC Coverage of the Opening Ceremonies - on tape delay, of course -- with this gem:

"19th century [Russian] imperialism is about to be swept away by two events -- the Russian Revolution AND THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK."

Brazil, YOU'VE BEEN WARNED. If you decide to deny visas to the entire NBC staff, we're behind you.
Revolution

One sign that your new fall show just may be running into a few, say, credibility problems is when a number of people beg me by email, Twitter and text message to snark the show.

Never one to fail to provide partial customer service on this blog, I did indeed finally sit down to go through it. Slowly. (My attention kept wandering, and honestly, in this case it is not my fault.) And I must say that apart from the generally eh acting, the overabundance of exposition, the predictable plot "twists", the constant and kinda disturbing bunnies, and mindboggling indifference to ordinary things like, say, not entirely at random, "physics," "biology," and "alcohol production," it –

Eh. No. The show did manage to pull itself together, sorta, in the last two minutes, but everything prior to that was worthy of some serious snark.

So here you go, readers! Spoilery for the entire first episode. )
So mostly a few random Olympics links for your perusal:

1. Over at the AV Club, Ryan McGee takes on NBC's problematic coverage of the Olympics. McGee is particularly good at discussing the broadcast versus streaming options, and NBC's dilemma.

2. Weightlifter Zoe Smith explains to various people that she's not actually doing weightlifting to become attractive to men.

3. Never let a lack of boats stop you from rowing at the Olympics.

4. This Polish player plays table tennis without a right forearm, and is really good (link may not work outside the United States, or inside either; try Googling Natalia Partyka.) She will also be competing at the Paraolympics.

5. Eight badminton players suspended for trying the strategy of throwing games. Spectators are not getting a refund.

Possibly more later if I reach a coherent state.
1. Regarding NBC's Sunday coverage, I can do no better than to quote Jeff Weiner of the Orlando Sentinel: "Dear @NBC, despite what you think, people will turn in in droves to watch live sports on a Sunday afternoon – Sincerely, the NFL." Yes. That.

2. Despite that and interrupted viewing anyway from various causes, the synchronized diving? Awesome. I am especially in love with the swimsuits from the Chinese diving pair which manage to be gorgeous, flattering and practical and probably one reason they won the gold medal, but also delighted to see two people absolutely thrilled to win a silver medal at the Olympics. Because, yes, that is an amazing accomplishment – just getting to the Olympics is an amazing accomplishment, for that matter – and doing so by spinning after leaping off a diving board, yay.

3. Gymnastics? Continues to terrify me.

4. Tor.com posts? Continue to get done with this in the background. Fiction? Still slow. Very slow. Frozen honey moves faster. But I don't really think I can blame the Olympics for this. (Or so I tell myself.) But I did finish a small piece of flash fiction this morning, quite by accident, which has done wonders for my mood.

5. H and I saw not one, not two, but THREE bald eagles yesterday -- one a juvenile. And a bunny rabbit quickly getting beneath the nearest cover. Today, the lawn was visited by a flock of ibises. We're nowhere near the flocks of birds Audubon described when he made his first visit to Florida, but I keep hoping we are inching back.

5. On a rather less pleasant subject, the Readercon Board of Directors statement is here, the petition protesting that statement is here, and yes, to confirm the multiple emails I have been getting on this, I believe Walling is one of the people referenced here I say "I believe" because it has been three years, I do have a neurological disorder which is playing havoc with my memory, and although Walling is a fellow Tor.com blogger, I did not connect the name with the face until Friday. Nor was he the worst person I encountered at Readercon.

I could say a great deal more, but I think plenty of pixels have been spilled on this already. Moving on!

6. Ben Payne has a few words regarding these sorts of blog pile ups here. (He says he doesn't mean me, but I'm pretty sure he does.)

7. And a more cheerful note, if you think YOU have problems, check out indignities suffered by this poor cat. Oh, the FELINITY.
Admittedly, I did not have high hopes for NBC's Olympic coverage to begin with. But, yesterday morning, I staggered out to realize that, gasp, NBC was doing something unusual: showing sports. (I KNOW!) The event in question was the men's cycling, which was pretty awesome even if the NBC commentators were under the impression that it was actually the Tour de France, but, CRASHES! Beautiful English countryside! Struggling at the last minute to win through all odds! Hampton Court! Buckingham Palace! YAY Olympics!

We took this as a decidedly positive sign, especially since this was followed by live showing of women's basketball (also awesome). Sure, we were also watching taped delayed Swimming Heats, but We Gained Expectations! NBC had Learned Its Lesson! We were going to --

We were going to watch an interview with a gymnastics coach, followed by a video of Emotional British People watching the Olympic torch race, while what NBC called the "marquee event of the day," Phelps versus Lochte in the swimming pool, was going on live. I took a nice long nap.

This pretty much set the tone for the rest of the day's coverage. NBC shifted from live coverage of various things to Touching Personal Stories. I caught up on some upcoming Tor.com reviews. Tape delayed events (I liked the rowing). More work on some Sekkrit Stuff. Bland Interviews. Tor.com reviews. Plenty of Commercials. No archery even as the rest of the world assured us that event had been pretty awesome.

The highlight, though, came later, when the local news, doing their best to put a happy face on the various murders and boating accidents of the day, breathlessly told us that they would NOT tell us who won the swimming race, to "keep the suspense" going. Literally five minutes later, NBC Nightly News popped up, announcing, "And the BIG NEWS OF THE DAY IS --" giving us the results of the race and a detailed commentary. (Sorry, those of you in Syria feeling that you are the big news of the day. Perspective, see?) So much for suspense.

Apart from the lack of suspense, the rest of the evening made decent enough background noise, what with men's gymnastics and swim races. I do find the gymnastics kinda freaky/scary to watch, partly because this was among my worst sports at school (I was unbelievably bad at everything except for the balance beam, where I was just very bad) and partly because I keep assuming they are going to fall and land on the equipment and never ever walk again and partly because part of me keeps thinking that bodies shouldn't move that way. Swimming, though, yay. Beach volleyball, though, painful (that's slamming on hard sand a lot.) Archery, though...well, can't comment on that. Not that I'm bitter.

You will notice that the hopeful word "Telemundo" does not appear in this post. This is because Telemundo abruptly stopped appearing on our TV. We're still getting Univision and a couple of other Hispanic channels, but Telemundo is only popping up in fits and starts. Alas; the short bits we've managed to see of Telemundo's coverage suggests that's been excellent.

(And yes, I assure alarmed readers that this blog will be returning to non-sports coverage after this Olympic interlude, and no need to worry that football season will be intruding.)
Ok. After Thursday, I was almost ready to cut NBC a break. Almost. Mostly because – are you listening, NBC? – Thursday night NBC took the wise step of showing LIVE SPORTS COVERAGE and reducing the number of irrelevant episodes about polar bears. I had, I decided, been a bit hasty in my judgment of NBC.

And then came Saturday night, where NBC shifted to showing us irrelevant video about, god help us, the Canadian Mounties, who, last I checked, are not an Olympic Event. This was, I am assured, to Teach Us About Canada. (I am continually amused by NBC's attempts to paint Canada as a foreign and exotic country, and not as the land of low drinking ages that I know and love.*) This was but one lowlight in an evening that largely went like this:

Men's short track: LIVE! ON TV! TREMENDOUSLY EXCITING!

Women's short track comes on. NBC immediately cuts to taped coverage of other events.

Men's short track: LIVE! ON TV! TREMENDOUSLY EXCITING! General agreement that we need more short track. Fortunately, the women are coming up –

NBC immediately cuts to taped coverage of other events.

This was the evening where [profile] tgregoryt fell asleep while watching, and really, it was difficult (for anyone other than an infuriated small grey cat) to blame him. But all of this paled to the utter incompetence that was the Sunday program. For those that missed it, and I am not blaming any of you, here's what happened:

Sunday afternoon: The Olympics debut a fabulously exciting new event, ski cross (basically, four downhillers leaping down the ski cross track at the same time, allowing you to really watch them race, plus, flying jumps and crashes.) Of this, we see only the qualification runs, which include just one skier shooting down the ski cross track at one time, not allowing anyone to really watch a race, live. The Olympics also have the Super Combined, where American Bode Miller took gold. Of this, we see nothing live, because, NBC has decided to show the Czech/Russia hockey game instead.

Which meant that, Sunday evening, since NBC had, it decided, already shown us hockey, it would instead fill the evening with taped coverage of the Super Combined and Ski Cross and more Inspiring Stories and occasional live shots of "Hi! I'm an ice dancer! Laugh at my costume!" until suddenly a freaked out NBC realized that it was missing the real story of the night, abruptly cutting into taped bobsled footage (with assurances that we'd get back to that) with "Whoops! So sorry we absolutely failed to show you the most exciting event of the night!" Grr.

Not that I'm a major fan of hockey, but, grr.

(For those reading in shock, and wondering, what has happened to this blog, rest assured, we will be returning to our usual sports free blogging in one more week – until 2012.)

* I do freely admit to my Canadian readers that far too much of my impression of Canada was formed in merry carousing in Montreal. Where, I must add, we encountered surprisingly few Canadian Mounties given what we were doing.

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