mariness

So, now that the Important Stuff is settled, what have we learned from this show?

( Aside from the lesson from the very first episode: never get on any flight from Australia to Los Angeles with that many good looking people. )

So, unless you've been living in a cave, and even then, you have probably heard that Lost is ending tonight. I thoroughly expect the finale to be an utter disappointment, leaving us all with more questions than answers and feeling completely let down and wondering why, precisely, we all spent so many hours watching this show, but I will be watching to have one critical burning question answered about the sole remaining thoroughly likeable, sensible, morally admirable character*:

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DOG?

I realize, of course, that many of you have or will argue that Vincent the Dog was not actually a dog, and was in fact at various times a smoke monster, a ghost, a disguised Egyptian god, or even Something Else Weird and Strange. (For those of you that I have lost with this statement, I can only say that this is not the most coherent of television shows.) I also realize that the dog has not made an appearance for several episodes now, which is PRECISELY WHY I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIM.

So, you know, dog!

With that said, I'm not entirely sure when I will be seeing the actual show, partly because I've already been slightly spoiled for the last episode (although NOT ABOUT THE DOG, which just goes to show that people that post spoilers JUST DON'T CARE about IMPORTANT THINGS), but more because a last ditch attempt to sing and burn incense (not actually incense) in front of the TV still failed to gain the cooperation of ABC, which stubbornly continues to HATE US. (Or, love me during football season by blocking access to things which otherwise would be a loud weekly event in my fall life. Actually, thank you, ABC. While I'm at it, Fox, little convenient failures on Monday night next fall would be awesome. Thanks muchly. But I digress.) Since I'm not feeling physically great today, the tentative idea of heading over to my parents is also out (not to mention that doing that would involve answering the many moments of "huh?" "what" "where's [X character]" "what happened to the polar bear?" "what happened to the dog? I liked the dog" from my father, who has not seen any of the show since the second season and is still questioning why anyone would bother to tattoo a shark, another question I feel certain this show is not going to bother to answer). Since I feel certain I would have an equal hatred of the many, many commercials ABC will be airing during this event, I am surprisingly ok with this.

My initial plan was to watch the show Monday morning when it pops up on ABC's website and Hulu, but this plan ran into a slight snag: Monday is Landscaping Day around here, which, to put it mildly, is going to play havoc with the viewing experience. My main alternative free internet outlet is currently blocked by road construction, and more specifically, by a Giant Hole that the trike and I cannot navigate safely**, and since the road construction crews and the state of Florida aren't getting threatened by evil smoke monsters, I'm thinking the Giant Hole, unlike Lost, or actual answers to the show, will still be there Monday. That snag leads me back to the possibility of watching through less conventional/legal means. Hmm. Which in turn leads me back to my comment about commercials and not feeling particularly great. Hmm hmm.

Which is all to say I'm not sure when I will be posting my usual snark for the show, especially since I may (or may not) be vanishing from the internet tonight to avoid further spoilers, and especially since my usual snarking method is to pause the show whenever something Hits Me, so you all kinda get a running reaction. But yes, to answer the various emails in my box, there eventually will be snark.

I just hope the dog makes it.

* Actually, I would put Helen, a minor character, into this rare category of likeable, sensible and admirable as well, but we know what happened to her so I'm not all worried about her.

** On the bright side, the state of Florida is now acknowledging that we may "have a problem." So, progress!

Just to repeat a comment I made on zoethe's LJ: ( Extremely spoilery for The Candidate and season six of Lost. )

This blog entry has been getting a bit of local attention lately: it details a recent and unauthorized night time trip to Discovery Island, now abandoned for about ten years. Local and as far as I know completely unproven rumor suggests that Disney will be turning it into a Lost attraction just as soon as they and everyone else find out what the hell the show is actually about. That would be, like, AWESOME, Disney, especially if you provided a little smoke monster to go round and round, but I digress. Meanwhile, the island is apparently retreating to its former function as a bird habitat.

River County, which they used as an access point, used to be my favorite of the Disney waterparks. I'd always wondered why it was completely abandoned, especially given that Disney's two remaining waterparks do fill to capacity in the summer (which is way but way too many people) sending people off to rival water parks not on Disney property, which is not exactly the way Disney would prefer to do things. The bacteria explanation is one of the more believable ones. I had heard other explanations: that it never attracted enough people (probable, given that River Country was smaller than the other waterparks and was only accessible via a bus and then a walk through Fort Wilderness) and thus could never meet Disney's profitability standards, and that Disney wanted to focus on waterparks that could remain open year round. I don't know.

I'll just add that, yes, I have seen the occasional alligator on that lake, one of many reasons swimming to Discovery Island is probably not the best idea (that and I am betting Disney security is not going to take kindly to people they catch on little outings like this one). Oh, and that I'm kinda sad I never went back when it was open. Even if I have a chance to see it later in the company of a little smoke monster.

1. Over the weekend, I finally got to enjoy my Christmas present from anaisis (and thanks!): the chance to see The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged), something that I've been trying to get to for, oh, the last fifteen, twenty years ago, and which just happened to show up at the only theater in range of my trike. Excellent show. I'm assuming they tailor it for all local audiences, or perhaps this group just really liked improv, given the number of local jokes – and the small fact that they spoiled a small part of this season of Lost, something I think we can correctly assume was not in the original script. If you get a chance to see it, do, since everyone needs to have Hamlet completely ruined for them every once in awhile.

2. I may have more to say about this later, but for now, let me just say that I am increasingly convinced that everyone involved with Lost has very, very deep Bunny Issues. Forget the island and the crash survivors for a moment. WILL NO ONE THINK OF THE BUNNIES???? Also, please reassure me that the greater Los Angeles area has more than one hospital. This is becoming a true health concern.

3. I only catch Chuck on a decidedly irregular basis (I've missed most of this season) but the this week's episode touched my happy buttons, even if the main villains seemed oddly incompetent; it's up on Hulu.com if you missed it.