Lessons learned from Gen Con
Aug. 11th, 2011 07:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
marinessThe initial, picture-free report! (I haven't actually had the chance to look through my pictures yet, not that I took many since my cheap camera kept objecting to the light, even when my camera and I were in nice cheery sunlight.)
1. The promises of Staples to absolutely, positively, have your business cards printed and ready to go by Tuesday will not be worth the paper they were not printed on.
2. You will suddenly realize just why the business center at this particular Staples is so frequently empty.
3. This will be followed by the sad, sad, realization that your roommates have decided to listen to audiobooks on the way up to GenCon "so you won't sing….Well, not just that, but bonus!"
4. Audiobooks emphasize the strengths and weaknesses of novels. For instance, in the first chapters of Ghost Story, Dresden frowns. A lot. Nearly every other sentence in some scenes. Also, Ghost Story moves, a lot. About every sentence in some scenes.
[Sidenote: Outside of a single episode of the Dresden Files, this was my first encounter with the books, and I'm not sure what it says about me, or the book, that I figured out one of the twist endings in the very first chapter, and figured out the other one about one-third of the way through, despite dozing through portions of the book. I don't know if this was because of the Falling! Anvils!, or that the Anvils! were much more apparent in John Glover's rich, slow voice (beautiful job) or if I've just read too much, or written too much, or if this happened because I was more analyzing the text than following it. But for a long car ride? The audiobook was awesome, highly entertaining, fast moving stuff.]
5. You will not be able to write short sidenotes.
6. No matter how you try to turn when lying down in the back seat of a Chevy Jeep Cherokee, one of the seatbelts will be perfectly positioned to dig into your back. On the other hand, space for plenty of pillows.
7. One of your roommates is completely capable of announcing that he has a sudden desire for really good barbeque, you know, Georgia and North Carolina stuff….right after you've just crossed the border into Indiana.
8. An entire room of a former Art Deco train station can be transformed into a steampunk submarine, merely by adding:
a) Walls (transported by truck)
b) Walls with portholes showing swimming if rather blurry fish
c) a 1950s style radio outfitted with things that went sparkle and buzz
d) various steampunky things
e) various people more than willing to wear bronze goggles and Victorian bustles.
9. When attempting to describe this on Twitter, your mobile browser will not accept that "steampunk" is a word. This will lead you to yell, "STEAMPUNK IS SO A WORD" in the center of a steampunk submarine, which will in turn lead to small applause and nearly everyone agreeing that really, steampunk is best combined with cookies, with a small but fervent contingent arguing that really, steampunk is best combined with booze.
10. The optimistic description of Gen Con organizers that construction in downtown Indianapolis is much better this year and thus a delightful place for mobility scooters will turn out to be almost entirely incorrect.
(On the bright side, this year I toppled over only once, largely thanks to the new skyway between the Crowne Plaza hotel and the convention center. Still. Indianapolis remains the only location where that scooter has toppled over. You might want to think about that, Indianapolis. You won't, but you might want to.)
11. The lesson regarding the torn pajamas will be so embarrassing to all concerned that you will all agree that it can never, ever, be talked about on the internet.
12. It will be surprisingly difficult to get everyone to agree that Facebook counts as the internet.
13. When you announce via that you have just killed some bunnies, this statement will be a) misinterpreted, and b) lead to some cruel speculation about Indianapolis.
[Second sidenote: this was the first time I'd ever played Killer Bunnies, and I found it silly if ultimately unsatisfying, unlike other silly but ultimately satisfying games.]
14. It actually takes fewer games and game time than you might think to earn a little Knight of Catan ribbon.
15. No one will believe you on this point.
16. Indianapolis, Indiana turns out to be an easier place to meet people from central Florida than, say, the Orange County convention center. I'm just saying.
17. Despite promising yourself that this time you really really will go to the Artsgarden, you will completely fail to do so. (I didn't even make it past the Steak and Shake, let alone into the Circle Mall, so this is not at all surprising.
18. Playing with sheep is considerably less dirty than it sounds.
19. Ok, it really isn't, but I'm trying to pretend here.
20. "Did you just – stroke my sheep?"
21. "Can I squeeze your sheep?" "I never really know how to answer that."
22. No one will believe your protests that the previous four statements had nothing to do with a Settlers of Catan game. (Admittedly, the sheep discussion did happen in the same room with the giant Settlers board, but, still.)
23. You can spend significant time wondering if you could set up a giant Settlers game in the small house in your back yard.
24. Or, you know, a Lego Robot chess board. That would be TOTALLY AWESOME.
25. A trip intended to focus on gaming can have a disturbing minor theme of strange toilets. (Seriously. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WAS UP WITH THIS.)
26. A father of a ten year old is perfectly capable of bragging that he watches Game of Thrones with his son because his son, unlike other kids, is up to it.
27. This same father will be equally capable of frequently standing up and leaving the game (which he is playing in) leaving the rest of the players waiting.
28. It will surprise no one when he is shortly joined by an annoyed wife and two small and exhausted children (a small squeaking toddler and a four year old) or when his toddler starts grabbing at the game pieces.
29. An early end to this sort of game is almost a relief.
30. You have not really understood the phrase "kinda wrong" until you've seen 40 odd zombies waving light sticks and dancing to "Time Warp."
31. When not dancing, zombies sometimes lurch down the hallways of the Indianapolis Convention Center. In large groups. I'm just warning you.
32. Also, gaming conventions can be suddenly interrupted by large hordes of tiny pirates all happily singing "YO HO HO AND SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS" swinging little plastic swords. (Adorable.)
33. A sparkly blue rubber dragon wrapped around a wrist can provide a surprising amount of pleasure. (I actually got this to put on my trike, since current trike is not purple and thus not completely awesome yet, and needs a dragon or two, but then found that I really liked it around my wrist.)
34. Less of a lesson, and more of a recommendation for Lascaux, a game I demoed for the first time over at Gen Con, which combines strategy, a bit of betting, luck, cards, and guessing. One of the hands down best new games I tried out.
35. Gen Con means settling down with friends and kettle corn in comfy chairs to try out a new board game (Fortune and Glory) and getting unexpectedly joined by a gentleman from Yorkshire willing to use an outrageous French accent.
36. Unfortunately, this outrageous French accent will disrupt your attempts to portray a Californian pilot.
37. Milkshakes are really wonderful things.
38. On the way home, despite a pause for a steak revival, you can be so exhausted that you will agree to stop at any hotel that is not currently getting overrun by zombies.
39. That is, until you enter the one hotel in Georgia which would be significantly improved by an invasion of zombies.
40. On careful consideration, you will realize that even zombies will refuse to stop in this hotel, which features the following characteristics: non-functioning "free" internet, ants in the bathroom, greasy covers on the bed, bloodstains in the sink, rust all over the bathtub, nicks and bangs everywhere and the distinct smell of cigarette smoke, this last because the hotel has thoughtfully made every other room a smoke-free room, allowing those rooms to be surrounded by cigarette smoke. And I am not even mentioning the issues with the air conditioning. (Also, the rate we were charged was not the rate quoted on the iPhone app but frankly in the greater scheme of things I'm willing to overlook that.)
41. As you request an immediate refund, you will finally see the small sign that should have clued you in earlier: "No refunds after 15 minutes."
42. Oddly, the next hotel, which featured soft porn in its lobby, will be more family-friendly than the previous hotel, which featured the Disney Channel in its lobby.
43. Your attempt to write this up will be constantly interrupted by a cat, who feels, with some justification, that he has already lost enough of your time on this already.
Overall, an awesome time – more awesome than I've written up here – what with days and days of games and meeting new people, despite the various bruises and occasional bouts of dizziness/fatigue.
1. The promises of Staples to absolutely, positively, have your business cards printed and ready to go by Tuesday will not be worth the paper they were not printed on.
2. You will suddenly realize just why the business center at this particular Staples is so frequently empty.
3. This will be followed by the sad, sad, realization that your roommates have decided to listen to audiobooks on the way up to GenCon "so you won't sing….Well, not just that, but bonus!"
4. Audiobooks emphasize the strengths and weaknesses of novels. For instance, in the first chapters of Ghost Story, Dresden frowns. A lot. Nearly every other sentence in some scenes. Also, Ghost Story moves, a lot. About every sentence in some scenes.
[Sidenote: Outside of a single episode of the Dresden Files, this was my first encounter with the books, and I'm not sure what it says about me, or the book, that I figured out one of the twist endings in the very first chapter, and figured out the other one about one-third of the way through, despite dozing through portions of the book. I don't know if this was because of the Falling! Anvils!, or that the Anvils! were much more apparent in John Glover's rich, slow voice (beautiful job) or if I've just read too much, or written too much, or if this happened because I was more analyzing the text than following it. But for a long car ride? The audiobook was awesome, highly entertaining, fast moving stuff.]
5. You will not be able to write short sidenotes.
6. No matter how you try to turn when lying down in the back seat of a Chevy Jeep Cherokee, one of the seatbelts will be perfectly positioned to dig into your back. On the other hand, space for plenty of pillows.
7. One of your roommates is completely capable of announcing that he has a sudden desire for really good barbeque, you know, Georgia and North Carolina stuff….right after you've just crossed the border into Indiana.
8. An entire room of a former Art Deco train station can be transformed into a steampunk submarine, merely by adding:
a) Walls (transported by truck)
b) Walls with portholes showing swimming if rather blurry fish
c) a 1950s style radio outfitted with things that went sparkle and buzz
d) various steampunky things
e) various people more than willing to wear bronze goggles and Victorian bustles.
9. When attempting to describe this on Twitter, your mobile browser will not accept that "steampunk" is a word. This will lead you to yell, "STEAMPUNK IS SO A WORD" in the center of a steampunk submarine, which will in turn lead to small applause and nearly everyone agreeing that really, steampunk is best combined with cookies, with a small but fervent contingent arguing that really, steampunk is best combined with booze.
10. The optimistic description of Gen Con organizers that construction in downtown Indianapolis is much better this year and thus a delightful place for mobility scooters will turn out to be almost entirely incorrect.
(On the bright side, this year I toppled over only once, largely thanks to the new skyway between the Crowne Plaza hotel and the convention center. Still. Indianapolis remains the only location where that scooter has toppled over. You might want to think about that, Indianapolis. You won't, but you might want to.)
11. The lesson regarding the torn pajamas will be so embarrassing to all concerned that you will all agree that it can never, ever, be talked about on the internet.
12. It will be surprisingly difficult to get everyone to agree that Facebook counts as the internet.
13. When you announce via that you have just killed some bunnies, this statement will be a) misinterpreted, and b) lead to some cruel speculation about Indianapolis.
[Second sidenote: this was the first time I'd ever played Killer Bunnies, and I found it silly if ultimately unsatisfying, unlike other silly but ultimately satisfying games.]
14. It actually takes fewer games and game time than you might think to earn a little Knight of Catan ribbon.
15. No one will believe you on this point.
16. Indianapolis, Indiana turns out to be an easier place to meet people from central Florida than, say, the Orange County convention center. I'm just saying.
17. Despite promising yourself that this time you really really will go to the Artsgarden, you will completely fail to do so. (I didn't even make it past the Steak and Shake, let alone into the Circle Mall, so this is not at all surprising.
18. Playing with sheep is considerably less dirty than it sounds.
19. Ok, it really isn't, but I'm trying to pretend here.
20. "Did you just – stroke my sheep?"
21. "Can I squeeze your sheep?" "I never really know how to answer that."
22. No one will believe your protests that the previous four statements had nothing to do with a Settlers of Catan game. (Admittedly, the sheep discussion did happen in the same room with the giant Settlers board, but, still.)
23. You can spend significant time wondering if you could set up a giant Settlers game in the small house in your back yard.
24. Or, you know, a Lego Robot chess board. That would be TOTALLY AWESOME.
25. A trip intended to focus on gaming can have a disturbing minor theme of strange toilets. (Seriously. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT WAS UP WITH THIS.)
26. A father of a ten year old is perfectly capable of bragging that he watches Game of Thrones with his son because his son, unlike other kids, is up to it.
27. This same father will be equally capable of frequently standing up and leaving the game (which he is playing in) leaving the rest of the players waiting.
28. It will surprise no one when he is shortly joined by an annoyed wife and two small and exhausted children (a small squeaking toddler and a four year old) or when his toddler starts grabbing at the game pieces.
29. An early end to this sort of game is almost a relief.
30. You have not really understood the phrase "kinda wrong" until you've seen 40 odd zombies waving light sticks and dancing to "Time Warp."
31. When not dancing, zombies sometimes lurch down the hallways of the Indianapolis Convention Center. In large groups. I'm just warning you.
32. Also, gaming conventions can be suddenly interrupted by large hordes of tiny pirates all happily singing "YO HO HO AND SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS" swinging little plastic swords. (Adorable.)
33. A sparkly blue rubber dragon wrapped around a wrist can provide a surprising amount of pleasure. (I actually got this to put on my trike, since current trike is not purple and thus not completely awesome yet, and needs a dragon or two, but then found that I really liked it around my wrist.)
34. Less of a lesson, and more of a recommendation for Lascaux, a game I demoed for the first time over at Gen Con, which combines strategy, a bit of betting, luck, cards, and guessing. One of the hands down best new games I tried out.
35. Gen Con means settling down with friends and kettle corn in comfy chairs to try out a new board game (Fortune and Glory) and getting unexpectedly joined by a gentleman from Yorkshire willing to use an outrageous French accent.
36. Unfortunately, this outrageous French accent will disrupt your attempts to portray a Californian pilot.
37. Milkshakes are really wonderful things.
38. On the way home, despite a pause for a steak revival, you can be so exhausted that you will agree to stop at any hotel that is not currently getting overrun by zombies.
39. That is, until you enter the one hotel in Georgia which would be significantly improved by an invasion of zombies.
40. On careful consideration, you will realize that even zombies will refuse to stop in this hotel, which features the following characteristics: non-functioning "free" internet, ants in the bathroom, greasy covers on the bed, bloodstains in the sink, rust all over the bathtub, nicks and bangs everywhere and the distinct smell of cigarette smoke, this last because the hotel has thoughtfully made every other room a smoke-free room, allowing those rooms to be surrounded by cigarette smoke. And I am not even mentioning the issues with the air conditioning. (Also, the rate we were charged was not the rate quoted on the iPhone app but frankly in the greater scheme of things I'm willing to overlook that.)
41. As you request an immediate refund, you will finally see the small sign that should have clued you in earlier: "No refunds after 15 minutes."
42. Oddly, the next hotel, which featured soft porn in its lobby, will be more family-friendly than the previous hotel, which featured the Disney Channel in its lobby.
43. Your attempt to write this up will be constantly interrupted by a cat, who feels, with some justification, that he has already lost enough of your time on this already.
Overall, an awesome time – more awesome than I've written up here – what with days and days of games and meeting new people, despite the various bruises and occasional bouts of dizziness/fatigue.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-08-12 03:27 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-08-12 03:38 am (UTC)