I thought about writing a year end summary, but figured I hadn't even really talked about December yet. So, lessons learned in December:
1. Butterbeer is indeed foamy, sweet, delicious, and, to be truthful, just a teensy bit nauseating. Or more than a teensy bit nauseating.
2. Hogwarts can be explored in many ways. Some of these ways have elevators. Some of these ways lead you through the final store. Some of these ways involve lengthy communication with team leaders and discussions of just exactly where the damn Universal parking lot is and why is it unlikely that any wheelchair user barring a marathon trained one is overly likely to be able to manage getting a manual wheelchair from the damn parking lot to Hogwarts. Suggestions, again, that Universal consider a) moving its disabled parking, b) expanding its disabled parking, c)
telling its parking attendants where the disabled parking is so that people do not go round and round and round lakes and find themselves going through the entire parking lot AGAIN.
3. You can, indeed, spend considerably more time in December contemplating disabled parking than you had ever wanted or wished to.
4. Four people can attend Gatorland and have a very different idea of it. Possibly because two of the people sat on gators; three of the people bought fudge, and only one person (to my knowledge) got mad at the bathrooms.
5. Alligators, are not, for the most part, the cutest creatures on earth. Baby alligators, however, are still remarkably adorable, even knowing that they will happily remove your fingers.
6. One issue with living in Florida too long, and spending extensive time in the Everglades, is that the response to a 16 foot and very fat gator is, oh, whatever.
7. The fudge at Gatorland is, hands down, the best fudge at any theme park in Florida, bar none, hands down.
8. I can on occasion be repetitive and wordy.
9. Some of you are doubtless thinking we all learned lesson 8 well before this December.
10. Sea lions are awesomely cute, even when you are hearing a story about how one of them nearly ripped the head off a fellow sea lion leaving him with a bloody and kinda bare scalp. And by awesomely cute, I mean, dangerously awesomely cute.
11. Dolphins are best appreciated under the influence of fudge. And coffee. And coffee and fudge. I think you get where I'm going with this.
12. A restaurant can be perfectly adequate and even enjoyable until you take relatives there, hoping they will enjoy themselves.
13. Waiters who are unable to talk will also find it difficult to deliver correct orders.
14. This sort of combination will lead to skipping any form of tiramisu and heading right on to the Coldstone Creamery. Which, all in all, is not an entirely bad thing.
15. The Sanaa restaurant at Disney's Animal Kingdom Lodge is actually an interesting way to see Animal Kingdom without venturing into it; animals wander by, people bang drums, plus, creative and wildly exciting booze.
16. We, as humans, can design amazingly entertaining and even artistic electrical fences.
17. A woman from the Philadelphia can go to great lengths to try to convince a British magician that she is not, absolutely not, anything like anyone on the Jersey Shore, whatever her accent, while wearing high heeled boots, fishnets and a miniskirt that barely, but barely, covers her butt.
18. Some Americans are, alas, unable to distinguish between images of Queen Elizabeth II and Lady Liberty.
19. It is not as easy as you might think to perform card sharks for an extremely drunk man, also from Philadelphia, and also, absolutely, and completely, not like anyone on the Jersey Shore, however much said drunken man may be appear to be impersonating several of the cast members of the Jersey Shore.
20. The combination of drunkenness, miniskirts and questionable assumptions about the British Royal Family will send even the most warmth-loving British magician out to do card tricks in the cold.
21. From
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fizzgig_bites and myself: the word of the staff at the Big River Grille & Dining Works at Disney's Boardwalk is not to be trusted in pretty much anything. Except perhaps the beer. Which we didn't order.
22. Fireworks.
Ok, that wasn't a lesson, exactly, more a moment to be savored—it was a pretty amazing show. Hmm. Lesson. I like fireworks, although again, we all kinda knew that one already.
23. It is, indeed, possible to back out of an elevator only to confront a clown.
24. The longer spiced apple cider simmers, the better it tastes. If you are clever, you can conceal this as a cooking technique. If you are not, everyone will yell at you for concealing the spiced apple cider from everyone.
25. A clown can throw a light at a child, and steal it back again.
26. An egret directly outside your window can end up being a rather aggravating experience, especially if the egret is also aggravated.
27. You can spend several minutes trying to sum up visits from friends before realizing that you actually can't, and should have spent this time eating chocolate or baking brie instead.
28. You can spend much of the month barely discussing either of the three most lifechanging things that happened in it.
29. Your very best holiday present may come from a very unexpected place, and may actually end up getting delivered in March.
(Traditional publication/writing summary for the year probably coming up soon. Probably.)
(And as I was typing this out, last lesson: my cats are really never going to get used to fireworks, are they?)
